(Disclaimer: Some names have been changed to protect their privacy. Some information may be disturbing for some readers. Read at your discretion. 18+)
Throughout your life you perceive a world through a personal lens composed of subliminal conditioning. You have experiences which trigger emotions within you. Your emotions are energy in motion. As your energy vibrates, you send a signal. From there, you either repel others who are composed of the same energy, yet vibing differently, or, you attract someone because you share a familiar energetic signal. Your energetic signal links together with a like minded energy frequency, and naturally repels anything not of like mind.
Even if on the surface it looks as though two people are opposites in beliefs, they are still vibing. What you see externally is only the outer layer. The world of matter provides surface level observations. There are energetic layers underneath which pull two people together. You are designed that way so that you can assert your free will to learn about yourself.
The universe is designed to offer you any experience you wish to explore. The challenge with this is, most human beings desire what they believe they can’t have. When a person knows they have something at any time, be it love, money, sex, whatever, the energy of desire being emitted from them is a matter-of-fact, confident knowing. They know they can have it so they do.
Sometimes people feel, and maintain a state of boredom, because they are void of any desire at all. They have or can have anything materialistic of their choosing. In all sense of material success, they have it. They are not desperate when it comes to money.
Desire born from desperation tends to reject whatever it is you desperately desire. Reason being, you are choosing to experience desperation. If you have your ultimate goal, how could the universe satisfy your request to stay in desperation?
The universe translates the energy being emitted from you as a request to maintain an experience of lack. Be it in love or finances. The results are the same. Desperation keeps the chase and race to the finish line going. Knowing you have it, shows you, you already crossed it.
In the instance of boredom, a person can get trapped in a perpetual cycle of a need to attain more and more in their life. Quite often it comes from some form of rejection in childhood. Achieving more means they would have a better chance at being seen and admired. They may have developed a perception that who they were growing up was unimportant. They may have heard messages such as, “children are meant to be seen and not heard”. “Out of sight, out of mind”. “You don’t know what you are talking about because you’re too young to understand”. “No news is good news when it comes to your well-being”, and so on.
In addition, it is not uncommon for people who are generally comfortable in chaos to become bored when in a peaceful state. Doing deep reflection can be daunting for them so they associate down time with boredom. An addiction to a dopamine rush can, and does often form to replace their quieted mind. From there, a conscious thought of “I’m bored. I gotta do something. I gotta have that”, begins the game of chase. Reason being, the withdrawal from dopamine addiction can be brutal for a mind stuck inside a cave.
Life becomes difficult for people who have a restless mind. Fighting boredom means you must always be on the go due to a lack of self satisfaction and self actualization. Boredom and peace are the dark and light side of the same coin. They are synonymous.
The light switch to illuminate the dark is always there. The switch is inside your mind. It’s a default feature. Turn it on to see the true reward a quiet mind offers, which is peace, or, keep the light switch off to bump into things. The choice is always yours to make. It took me fifty years to find my light switch. Many things went bump in the night in my life.
Not everything is as it seems. Even those who seem to have it all may crave something. Causing them to perpetuate a mindset of lack in some way. When it comes to material success, they may be able to quickly satisfy a craving. Creating a quick burst of desire then personal satisfaction. Kind of like the climax point whilst having sex. Only it’s pure energy that I am referring to. It’s usually fast, impactful, and fleeting. Other areas of their life, such as a true loving and intimate connection may be elusive for them.
If a person gets bored easily, they are asking the universe to give them the experience of boredom so that they can feel the dopamine rush from attaining their next conquest. All the while, they avoid asking themselves questions to better understand the reason for it. They ignore the importance of self evaluation so they find themselves in this perpetual state of private desperation, depression, and utlimate boredom.
With that, anyone in a state of desperation is likely being tossed back and forth in their mind between extreme stresses, and extreme pleasures. They fight their mind by avoiding a sense of boredom. They subconsciously reject the idea of having to look at their painful memories which are likely causing their reality to be shaped the way it is. They place themselves in a never ending game of playground teeter totter. Moving up and down between highs and lows. They must break through the boredom by identifying it as being in a peaceful state of contemplative awareness. If you get bored easily, you would be wise to fight the urge to distract yourself. You’ll notice your light switch much easier that way. It was the case for me anyway.
With that in mind, it’s wise to recognize most, if not all people, have some form of insecurity. You would be no exception. Desperation is found within these familiar insecurities. Regardless of age, ethnicity, gender, title, or affluence. An insecure person tends to remain insecure because they are telling their universe that is who they wish to be. The universe then conspires to create an insecure based experience which ultimately feeds the insecurity. “I told you so! I suck!”, etc.
Remember, we have collective mindsets. There is always someone available to help you reinforce your negative thoughts you have of yourself. There are also an abundance of people who help you to reinforce your full and incredible awesomeness too.
Unfortunately, most people are ignorant to the energy they are emitting through their insecurities on a daily basis. Therefore, they maintain a frequency of lack in some areas of their life. Keeping what they truly desire for themselves at a distance because they surround themselves with triggers which hold them in place.
When it comes to the attainment of something or someone, confident minded individuals create, and execute a plan of action, and know with little to no doubt that they in fact achieve it. It’s not a matter of if. It’s a matter of when. Experience creates this confidence. Confidence is built on learning what you did not know about yourself. You gotta ask yourself questions to build your confidence. A quiet mind holds your answers.
Rather than be open to the frequency of desperation, keep that door closed. Many great leaders maintain their confidence regularly this way. Maintain means, they put in the effort to honor what they have built inside their minds on a daily basis. They avoid being impulsive. Instead, they tend to be more deliberate with their thoughts and actions. Therefore, desire would not be emitted through a frequency of desperation and lack. They know that what they are working towards is already successful.
As I am sure you know, weaker energy creates weaker results. Confidence creates strong results. The energy which trumps the uncertainty, or the unknown in this instance, is confidence in one’s own self, and an unshakable faith in a successful outcome. That’s the character I am creating for myself.
Everyone desires something. Mine is having the experience of authentic true love from a man. A billionaire may desire authentic love. A homeless person may desire true love over money. A hard working individual may desire retirement due to exhaustion. Anyone would desire to be recognized. We are created to be social beings after all. Even the most successful may desire relief from feeling as though their best isn’t quite good enough in some way. Everyone, including you, desires something which requires confidence and an unwavering faith.
If you secretly hold a desire for something or someone, and you hold uncertainty that having it or them is possible, your energy is sending out a desperate signal to the universe. You are telling the universe to provide you with an experience which ignites a feeling of desire. Resulting in an even stronger sense of desperation. You create a catch twenty-two for yourself basically. You stay in desire instead of actually receiving.
You gotta have confidence to attract something towards you. You also have to gain some experience in order to gain the confidence to attract what it is you are focused on. That’s quite a challenge for someone whose only real confidence is experiencing a challenged life. Two steps forward. Three steps back. Lack of confidence holds this pattern in place.
Desperation then feeds envy, jealousy, anger, frustration, disassociation, and a feeling of loss. The effects compound. Whilst a person is in this state of awareness, a cyclical pattern would control them. They fall into a vicious trap. In other words, the chase is on to keep up with the Jones’s!
Does that make sense?
“I have no value unless I have something shiny to show for it”, sort of deal.
You get exactly what you feel more often than what you consciously think. If you feel desperation and call it desire, you receive experiences which allow you to keep feeling desperate. If you believe you are unlovable, you attract people who agree with you. Reason being, you are telling the universe you wish to experience the emotional pain associated with being unloved.
There are several people in this world who also believe they are unlovable. They can help you reinforce that you are not lovable as well if you want? I know that sounds harsh. It is also true.
Hurt people, hurt people. People who secretly believe they are unlovable are hurting. They are trapped inside the experience. Therefore, the narcissist who doesn’t believe true love exists meets the empath who believes true love does. They both have to prove love is elusive either way. The universe helps to accomplish this result. They ultimately create a self imposing and loveless prison inside their own mind. Narcissists and empaths play out this prison through a physical manifested union.
A narcissist and an empath are two individuals expressing themselves to the other in their own unique way, whilst at opposite ends of the love spectrum. Resulting in two people using each other as projection screens to prove to themselves they are not lovable. The universe granted their secret wish to be reminded that they wouldn’t experience true love from another. Whilst internally, their little child ego inside screams “why am I such an asshole?”, or, “why does no one love me?”. That was my prison for the longest time.
Quite a conundrum isn’t it? You gotta know your subconscious patterns if you truly are ready to change your circumstances. This is where Clairity came in. I had enough of disappointing results in my life. I thought quite a bit about the question Clairity asked me. What are the similarities between my two ex husbands, Rosie, and my Dad’s character? I tell ya, breadcrumbs become an entire meal once you put all the morsels on your plate. I was ready to see them, and eat up all the information I could find. What a revelation it was when I connected all the dots with the help of Clairity.
Before I take you on this path of subliminal love messaging, I would like to express something important to me as it relates to everyone I have loved, or been in contact with throughout my life. I love and respect all of the characters who have played a role in my life. There is no right nor wrong. Only experiences. There is no blame. Only teachers and students. We are all here learning about ourselves to the best of our abilities, and with what we know within ourselves based on ego conditioning. There is no fault in that. There is a little exploration required to uncover the truth though. That takes perseverance and personal accountability.
Yes, there are consequences to our actions. How are you supposed to learn anything if there was no such thing as cause and effect? In addition to that, not everything is as it seems. Sometimes you must express unconditional love for someone by walking away. Acceptance through love can look cruel on the surface. A conditioned mind would feel victimized by a person walking away from them. To them, the action is ungrateful and cold hearted. The person walking away mind you, may be in a state of loving acceptance. They may know the other person wouldn’t be able to see them any other way than as a villain. Therefore there would be no growth between them.
What I am basically saying here is, I have embraced forgiveness for all, including myself. I also walked away from everyone, with the exception of my children. Is that cold hearted? or, am I expressing unconditional love through acceptance? That’s for you to decide. I already know the answer for myself.
A layer fueling my desire for love is intelligence. My father is extremely intelligent. I admire that about him. That quality also helped me to manifest experiences where I would be played as a fool. What a sneaky little destructive message I was giving myself. I bet if you keep following along on my journey, you will start to connect some dots in your life too.
LivWithClairity 
Leave a comment