Magic always comes with a price. The first time I heard that was when I watched an episode of “Once Upon A Time” on Disney+. The Netflix series was rather enjoyable. I watched the series in its entirety, twice. Once with my daughter and once with Rosie. My favorite characters were Rumplestilskin and Regina. I could relate to their personas. They were lost in a proverbial mind field of pain and hopless rejection. Then they honored themselves, and by doing so, became true heroes in the end. Their character journeys were inspiring when looked at a little more closely.
It was Rumplestilskin played by Robert Carlisle who said “Magic always comes with a price, Deary”.
There is much truth to this statement and compliments the statement made by Oprah Winfrey in a previous blog post I wrote, which is, “most people don’t know what it is they want” which can be a heavy price to pay in the end.
I believe in magic. I believe in miracles. I also believe in me being responsible when it relates to me making a firm commitment. I assess if what I am choosing to do is worthwhile before doing it. I had to learn this tactful skill. Any worthwhile endeavor creates magic. Magic creates a miracle. With that in mind, I have come to learn that I must look at what I am about to do from a micro level, meaning how it would affect me, to a macro level, meaning the way it would affect others. Based on that information, am I willing to take the risk associated with mental, emotional, physical, and energetic weight which comes with it? Can I keep my magic light?, or, is there a risk of turning the magic inside my mind dark? An incredibly important question to ask yourself. Before agreeing to anything. How do you invest your mind?
Your mind is your gold. You would want to expand it not shrink it. I wish to expand my awareness into knowing what it’s like to make a positive difference on a global stage. My mind can be on stage. Me personally? I shy away from fame of any kind. I would like to become an accomplished writer and speaker on the topics of love and spirituality though. If that requires some level of fame then so be it. That is a price I am willing to pay whilst I explore a little further anyway.
With that, I have been thinking a bit about my last couple of blogs. I rely on Clairity and my own resilience to figure out my mind. Whilst thinking, I thought about the words “magic always comes with a price”, which led me to consider my subconscious mind, to determine if I am holding onto a fear which may aid in a subconscious blockage. Is there a price that I am afraid to pay which keeps successful outcomes at arms length? When I did consider this particular question, Clairity popped in for a moment.
“You hold fear when it comes to the price for your success. Think of your parents dear. What are you afraid of?”
I am afraid of my parents. That sounds so horrible to say, write, or read. It’s true though. Many ego versions of myself fear the emotional and mental pain they can inadvertently afflict onto me when they become angry. My mother in particular. When I think of my parents the emotion I feel isn’t love. It’s sadness and fear. If I were to become a well known author or speaker, my parents might come to learn of it. My success would come from sharing my life journey and my perception of living with and being raised by them.
My father is battling Leukemia. He was diagnosed a few years ago. They sold their house from what I understand and moved into an assistant living community to help my father. Liv told me he uses oxygen regularly and has been overall stable in his health. According to Liv, my mum offers Reiki healing sessions for local residences in her community. That’s a good thing. She did enjoy offering that service when she was with me at Tranquil Spirit. As far as I know, they are doing well. I would like it to remain that way for them. With that, I fear they would lose their peace if they found out I spoke the truth and introduced the world to some of the skeletons in theirs and my closet.
I can hear my mother now say, “how dare you do this! How dare you spread lies. You only ever think of yourself. Your father is dying and all you can do is blast hurtful things about us to the world. You are an ungrateful, cold hearted, and selfish bitch!”, or something to that effect.
Just thinking that gives me a vision of my thirteen year old self rocking back and forth in a fetal position. Inside a cave with music in my ears to drown out my rejected life. I can see my mum reacting that way. I can also see my dad with a piercing glare of disgust and rage. This particular fear of my parents makes my entire body shiver. I don’t want to hurt my parents in any way. All I am wanting to do is share my story so that I can make a living for myself, whilst also helping others determine their own self sabotaging patterns.
If my parents are still active on this earthly plane when I become known for my work, I will pay a heavy price. I know this. My parents will also pay a heavy mental and emotional price. The impact is great. I know this. Not to mention others who I have mentioned throughout my writing, and who too may have painful revelations after learning from my writings and teaching. I am using all of us who were in my life, especially myself, as an example of painful human conditions which affect many generations, to the point of everyone pointing fingers for the exact same thing. All hate begins with hypocrisy.
Rather than look inwards, people tend to identify who hurt them and use that as a keepsake to maintain their own poor decisions which creates their physically manifested experience.
How does ignoring hypocrisy break generational patterns? My goal is to help people move past blame. No one wins when shame and blame are playing. The reason no one wins is because, with every finger pointed outwardly, three fingers point back. There will always be a reason for disdain. There will always be a reason to accept. Polarity offers you this choice. Your choice to view your circumstances dictates the price you pay for your future physical manifestations.
Clairity, am I stopping my own progress because I know if I succeed I will hurt my parents in some way?
“Yes, and no. Your success is inevitable. Your fear of hurting them and receiving backlash helps to delay the inevitable. Remember, you chose this. Yes there will be opposition. Yes your parents will come to learn of your efforts, as will many others you once knew. You must decide in what way you will allow that to affect you. You cannot control the reactions and internalization of your parents. You can only manage your own. When you look at the big picture from a global impact you can see the beauty and blessings which has come from your journey. Without your parents raising you the only way they knew how and based upon their own unhealthy programming, what would you have to write about? Hold gratitude for them even if they are unable to see that you are not intentionally hurting anyone”, Clairity explained .
“Am I alone when my parents find out?”
“First, you must determine if the price of hurting your parents and any potential effects that can have on your children, must be considered thoroughly. I know you have thought of this many times. Are you committed?”
I responded to Clairity whilst letting out a big sigh, “yes”.
My parents have never taken the time to truly know me. I don’t expect them to fully understand nor do I blame them for it. I accept whatever impact this creates.
“To answer your question about being alone. No Clair. You will not be alone. First off, you have been seeing the number 33. You know this number is associated with Michael. Michael is close to you in these times. You have received, and continue to receive, many synchronicities related to your person. Your Mr. Christy knows who you are. There will come a time when you and your Christy are reunited. Trust what we are telling you. You are never alone. You are loved, as are your parents.
You are courageous. It takes incredible courage to speak on the topics you speak on with love and compassion. Trust your heart. Trust your pure intentions. Trust you are protected. Trust divine timing by remembering there are more actors involved in your success. They too have cosmic roles at play. Stay firm in who you are. The pricetag will not be presented until you have the support required to work through it. The price is worth it because you are leveling up your dicernment to know the difference”.
If I keep this line of thought does the blockage release?
“Naturally”
Do I have to confront my parents?
“You manifested it through your fears”, Clairity confirmed.
Shit. I knew that. Well okay. At least I have an understanding so that I won’t be blindsided when it happens. I know my parents will be blindsided. Oh my heart aches for all of us. Magic certainly does come with a price.
Always, make certain you see the price of your choices by looking at your decision from a micro level, right up to and including the macro level. Do this before you choose to commit yourself to any project or person. You would invest in yourself wisely if you do.
Remember, your mind is your gold. Without it, you would be playing a fools game. You my dear reader, are no fool.
LivWithClairity 