(Some names have been changed to protect their privacy. Some information may be disturbing for some readers. Read at your discretion. 18+)
My mum’s dad, my grandpa West, passed into spirit on May, 04, 1994. I remember this clearly. He passed away in the same month, and year, of my twentieth birthday. The twentieth birthday when I took a life through planned abortion. It was also during this timeframe when I brought Mother’s Day flowers to my mum before heading to my first husband, Albert’s, mother’s house, to celebrate with her and Albert’s siblings.
Albert and I had moved in together in April, 1993. Albert needed to leave his grandma’s house. I didn’t want to move with my parents to New Brunswick. My parents informed my brother and I that they were moving to New Brunswick during my first few months working for the Yellow Pages company.
I worked for Yellow Pages in Scarborough from 1992 through to 1999. Then returned for a stint from 2000 to 2001. I lived with my parents after high school in Ajax up until April, 1993. My timeline was slightly off in a previous entry. If you caught the discrepancy, bravo!, my astute regular reader. Thank you for noticing.
I commuted back and forth with our neighbor who had gotten me the job interview. Steve, my parents’ two doors down, neighbor, was in management. He was in charge of some of the advertising reps in the sales department. I went to work for Yellow Pages in July, 1992 as a file clerk, fresh out of high school.
I had only been working for Yellow Pages for less than a year when my parents informed Craig and I that they were moving. I was eighteen at the time, I think? Albert and I had to save up the money for the first and last month’s rent of the apartment. Plus everything we would need to live there comfortably. Albert and I also took our time finding the one for us. We wanted something in Scarborough. Rent prices were a tad bit pricy for us at the time. We found an apartment which was walking distance to my work for April, 01, 1993.
Albert took the car each day because he worked further into the city. Craig lived with my parents right up until they left for New Brunswick. You would hear my brother say, ‘why would I leave my mum and Dad’s? I get free food, free rent, and free laundry. What more could I ask for?”
Craig had a difficult time accepting their departure. He was also working full time. Living with my parents helped the money go ching-a-ling-a-ling in his pocket. I can respect that.
Craig moved in with his now wife’s parents. They lived there for a time. I believe they had bought their forever home shortly after getting married in 1996. I was more than accepting of my parents leaving because I was already settled in with Albert. I was also making a healthy income for myself.
I knocked on my mum’s front door. We must have been fighting about something. I am having a difficult time remembering what we were at odds about. I didn’t feel welcomed. I know that, so, I didn’t enter my parents’ home freely on that day. Normally I would have done.
My mum came to the door. “Hi mum. Happy Mother’s Day. I can only pop around for a minute. We are headed to Trenton. These are for you”. I handed my mum a medium sized bouquet of mixed flowers.
“This is all the effort you can put into seeing me on Mother’s Day? This is pathetic! You hurt me more than my dad’s passing!”.
My mum then threw the flowers down onto the ground and closed the front door. I left the flowers there on the ground. I walked away. I then got into the car with Albert. Albert then drove us to his mother’s house in Trenton, Ontario.
The drive consisted of me venting “damned if I do. Damned if I don’t” to Albert for about half of the almost two hour drive. The second half was listening to the band U2. We sang along with the songs to the extremely humbling best of our abilities.
“Music often helps lighten the mood. Music can help you relive difficult moments as well. This means, music can help you vibrate higher. Music can also help you remain in sorrow. It’s important to be aware of the power of music. Music’s lyrics and sound resonance are important to recognize within your awareness. When you are aware of the power music produces, music becomes a valuable ally. Music can then harmonize with what you are consciously creating”. ~ Clairity
My mum was extremely sensitive on this particular Mother’s Day. Her dad, like my dad was to me for the longest time, a man who could do no wrong. My mum was emotionally and mentally close to her dad. When my grandad passed, my mum grieved deeply. With that, she felt I was being incentive to her by not expressing enough love through quality time. I can understand that. With that said, projecting onto me the way she did was harsh.
Discord in my life was sort of a standard procedure in the month of May. I had a habit of attracting difficult circumstances right around my birthday each year. I am determined to create new empowering memories for my birthday to help balance the scales in my mind. May is a beautiful month, period. I also recognize the reason I created such turmoil for myself. I have integrated my fetal energy. This cycle has now come to an end.
The experiences Clairity was referring to were after my grandfather passed away. I was living in Ontario, Canada in a small one bedroom apartment with Albert. We had been living together in Scarborough for a little over a year. My mum and dad were living in Saint George, New Brunswick. They had moved to this quaint little town sometime in 1994. They moved after Mother’s day that same year. That I do know. My dad and mum moved to New Brunswick for my dad’s career advancement. I was already twenty years old when they moved. I started living with Albert when I was about three weeks shy of my nineteenth birthday. Albert was twenty-one, turning twenty-two the same day as me.
I had a dream. In this dream I left my body. I floated approximately three feet off of the ground. Anytime I left my body I felt floaty. This time was no different. I turned to look at my body sleeping. I saw the silvery energy cord attached to both myself and my body. Then I did an about left face. Only to find my vision start to become aware of the pixelated bedroom I was in being overtaken by darkness. The movement through the bedroom wall was instant, and yet, detailed as all heck. I felt a suction sensation when my body went through the wall. It was like an energetic pull I had little to no control over.
Once the bedroom’s image was gone, a new quick, and gradual, pixelated image appeared. I was outside of the apartment. I then intuitively flew as fast as, what seemed like, Superman could fly. Next thing I knew I was floating in the front yard of a creamy white coloured bungalow. I sensed I was in a different province. As soon as I sensed this I became curious.
“Am I at my mum’s and Dad’s?”, I thought.
As soon as I had that thought, once again, I suctioned myself through a wall. Seeing the outside pixelated image disappear, only for the bedroom of my parents’ new house to appear.
I hadn’t been to my parents’ new home by this time. I was too busy enjoying my life with Albert. My mum and I were on speaking terms though. That certainly helped this experience.
There I was floating against the wall. In front of me was a queen sized bed. Laying propped up by two pillows on the bed was my sleeping grandma West. She was sleeping in a semi-seated position on her back. Directly to the right of me was a bed side table. My grandma’s teeth and glasses were sitting on top of the table. Directly across from me, on the other side of the room, was another small end table, a large window, and a tallboy set of dresser drawers. To my left was a two door closet that moved on a metal guiding system. Directly left of me was the bedroom door which led you down a long hallway to the living room.
Sitting on the bed was my grandad. He was seated at the foot of the bed with his feet towards the floor. I say towards the floor because I didn’t actually see his feet. I assume they were at the end of his legs.
Grandad West had his left hand placed on my grandma’s left leg, near her ankle. He looked extremely young. If I were to take a guess, I’d say my grandad looked to be about thirty years of age. Even though he had white hair, his face looked young, vibrant, and healthy.
“Clair, tell your grandma to stop crying. I am by her bedside every night”.
My grandad was fixated on my grandma sleeping. He didn’t look at me, nor did his lips move during his statement. My instant response was, “okay grandad. I will”.
The messages between my grandad and I were telepathic. We understood each other perfectly. No sooner did I agree to my grandad’s request, I found myself being suctioned back through the bedroom wall. The defragmenting and redevelopment of the pixelated images was again experienced by me. The sensation of being suctioned then continued into a backwards flight, retracing my flight path. I was suctioned backwards to my apartment as quickly as I had moved out of it. I was then suctioned back through my bedroom wall and into my body. It was an incredible experience indeed.
Just a side note here; as I write this blog entry, I am fixated on the timeline dates. I remember vivid details. The stress I was constantly under may have blurred the lines of factual dates? My apologies for this. With that said, the timing is extremely close, if not completely accurate.
“Clair, the dates are of far less interest than the memories themselves. It is your memories which shape your reality, not the time stamp. You are reading your akashic records by way of your intuition, which involve your decision making based upon fated events. These fated events were created by your perceived choices. What you are being guided to do is optimize the gift of hindsight.
You prefer to learn through this way whilst you are on the earthly plain. You chose this learning style for your soul’s purpose in this lifetime. Rather than after this lifetime, once you return to full spirit awareness. You chose this for your path. There is a purpose to this. Do your best to relax on the dates. Focus on what you have learned instead” ~Clairity
Sometimes Clairity speaks through me. Words flow out of my mouth instantly at times, so does my writing. What you just read was a live interaction between Clairity and I. My ego became nervous that I am giving misleading information by potentially giving incorrect dates. Clairity’s awareness stepped in. It is for this reason, you will see a reflection of this with a ~Clairity after a written statement. When this occurs, I am being guided to let Clairity address you, or myself, in the present moment without forethought.
I struggled with telling my mum about my dream with my grandad West. My parents had invited my grandmother to stay with them whilst she grieved the passing of her late husband and friend. If my memory serves me correctly, my grandmother visited my parents over the summer of 1994. She was with my parents during the time of this dream.
According to my mum, my grandmother was frail and depressed. My mum thought the change of scenery in East Coast Canada would help her to heal. I’m certain the fresh ocean air was a beautiful change of pace for my grandma.
I decided to call my mum and inform her of what had occurred. My mum almost dropped the phone. She gasped and said, “I just got a recording back from a psychic using psychometry as her source of information in England”.
My mum shipped an old medical alert bracelet of hers to the woman in England. The woman read my mum’s bracelet and returned it to her with a message recording. My mum just so happened to receive the recording the same day I called to inform her of my dream.
“The woman used my jewelry to connect with me. On the recording she states that your granddad sits with your grandma every night”.
My mum’s response gave me chills. “Oh wow! That’s amazing”. I was relieved. I then explained, “grandad looked really young but he still had white hair”.
That’s when My mum confirmed, “your grandad had white hair since he was eighteen. This makes perfect sense”.
My mum explaining that to me shed all the doubt from my mind. My mum told my grandmother about my dream with her beloved. My grandma took a turn for the healthier after that.
“Clair, it is important we review the time with your grandad in spirit when he had scolded you for psychically linking with him as frequently as you did”.
I was chastised by my dead grandad West. Imagine that.
LivWithClairity 
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