(Disclaimer: Some names have been changed to protect their privacy. Some information may be disturbing for some readers. Read at your discretion. 18+)
When Rosie arrived at Liv’s place on August 08, 2023, to bring me back to Montreal, he was proudly wearing a shirt he had bought online for the occasion. The shirt displayed two lion heads. One of the lions had dark fur, representing Rosie. The other lion had blond fur, I assume to represent me. Both lions were touching forehead to forehead. The shirt looked stunning on Rosie.
I quietly noted he must have done a little homework about the lions gate portal before picking me up. Rosie knew I saw myself as more spiritual. I know little about the planetary systems nor star systems. I do know a fair bit about reading energy. I am becoming increasingly stronger at reading the unseen as I continue on my life journey.
I also noted that he bought one lions gate portal shirt instead of two. I found that interesting. Did he buy his shirt as a symbol of his bond with me to soften me up to him?, but also chose a symbol vague enough that any potential side woman wouldn’t know what it meant? Like an inside joke between us sort of thing? Was he avoiding the possibility of people recognizing we had the same shirt on at any time during our public outings? Was that too high of a risk for him? Is that the true reason for not buying me a shirt too? Or, was Rosie simply only thinking of Rosie? He did that a fair bit.
Perhaps he had concerns about potentially bumping into a woman he knew, or one he wanted to know? If we were both wearing the same shirt that would be awkward. Was he still on different dating apps? My curious mind wanted to know. My intelligent mind kept my curiosity quiet. Clairity had advised it was best to observe more and speak less. Speak when required. Listen when required. When neither speaking nor listening are required, observe. See past what you see.
Instead of inquiring about Rosie’s choices when it came to his shirt and new greeting, I smiled and kept a mental note. My heart was not fully open to him and I knew I was with someone highly intelligent.
With that, I also acknowledged his shirt and recognized how lovely it was. I also acknowledged that I said I was willing to forgive with both of us making a committed effort. The commitment I was willing to make was “let’s test the waters. I make no promises to stay. Not right now anyway”.
Rosie knew the plan for me to move in with him was under stricter terms. I told him I held the right to leave any time, if ever I felt we were unhealthy. I told him trust must be built not forced. Rosie agreed with the terms and said he would get me back to Liv’s if ever it came down to that. He said he knew the reconciliation would be hard and that he was absolutely committed to making things right.
Rosie was a man of big insinuated promises, not a man of committed tangible outcomes. I came to that conclusion when I fully awoke from the illusion in August of 2024.
One thing I can acknowledge about Rosie was when he was interested in learning something, he soaked the information in like a sponge. I suspect today, Rosie followed a few spiritual practicing influencers on TikTok. Rosie knew I knew how to read cards, decipher dreams, and understood some universal laws. Rosie also echoed many of my own teachings he had learned from me online as well. He admitted to watching my TikTok videos.
The challenge with Rosie was he only displayed interest in my interests when the information offered him insight about his circumstances. Rosie wasn’t necessarily interested in learning how to better himself with the information. Nor was he interested in entering my world. He was only encouraging me to enter his. It’s for this reason, him showing up whilst wearing a lions gate portal shirt, and said “grand rising” to me, threw me off a wee bit.
Was Rosie learning for him?, or, was he learning for me? I can’t say I have ever used the words “grand rising” before. I know some tarot readers on TikTok used that greeting. Me on the other hand, no. I usually say “good day” as my greeting.
The first thing that popped in my mind when Rosie said “grand rising” to me was, “who the hell are you and what did you do with Rosie?” Him saying grand rising felt inauthentic and weird. The vibe felt off. A chameleon perhaps?
Rosie was very good at implementing strategic changes at the onset of a new challenge. Unfortunately he had less ambition to sustain a consistent effort with these insightful learnings. Going to Montreal was going to prove what Clairity had been nudging me to see. The question, can Rosie truly be trusted and is he actually a man of his word? That’s what I was determined to find out and that was what my graduation year was all about.
I didn’t ignore the red flags so much as I stacked them in a corner of my mind to revisit later with my professor, Clairity. I refrained from weakly placed accusations or questions towards Rosie since I had little to no evidence. As per usual, I withheld my judgment until I was satisfied with what I had to come to know.
The drive to Montreal was pleasant. We talked about how the kids were going to be excited to see me. We kept me coming back a secret from them. I preferred it that way because I was more uncertain than I was certain about being with Rosie again. I also didn’t speak with the kids whilst I was gone because I didn’t want Rosie to use his kids as a weapon against my soft heart.
When I left the first time back in 2020, Rosie had his son Jean talking with me over Messenger. My love for Jean made it easier to deal with Rosie’s chaos. Rosie knew that and I knew Rosie knew that. I wasn’t about to let that slide in 2023. So with that, a surprise entry into their home was in order.
When I arrived the kids came to the door. “Clair! You’re here! How? Why? Are you staying?!”.
I hadn’t even gotten one foot inside the house. The kids were genuinely surprised and happy to see me. Since I knew Rosie spoke with his children about two of his infidelities, I said “your dad is fixing the situation. Your dad is owning up to his actions. Remember what I told you. Rather than judge a person based on their past”. Jean interrupted and finished the statement with, “judge them based upon what they have learned about themselves because of their past”. Exactly!
When I entered the front foyer of the split entry house, Rosie’s mum was standing at the top of the stairs. “Bonjour Clair. Bienvenue”, she greeted.
Before Rosie took me on the grand tour of his and his mother’s home, Rosie got my luggage case, my memory chest, and the plastic shelving I had taken from Liv’s out of the car and brought them downstairs. I didn’t have much so it took about five minutes to grab everything.
With that, my arrival went smoothly. The coming days on the other hand were a wee bit of a shock to say the least. There was also a familiar song playing quietly in the background of mind. “Hi hoe, hi hoe, it’s off to round three of work I go”. Only this time I wasn’t the outside hoe breaking up a marriage. I was the inside hoe pretending to be loved.
I may not have known I was being recruited to be a glorified house maiden with sexual benefits. Clairity sure did, and boy did she stay by my side during this rollercoaster ride.
LivWithClairity 
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